My parents are probably the best parents there are. Not lying. I'm not sure how they do what they do. Mom and Dad met when Mom was 13, started dating when she was 16 and got married when she was 19. They jumped right into life fresh out of high school and you would have never known that they were still children. Dad was a farmer, as he was most of my life, and Mom was a stay at home wife and at the age of 20 became a stay at home Mom. Dad worked long hours, getting up at 2 am to milk, coming home for breakfast and dinner. Mom stayed home with the children and taught us how to be well rounded kids. Throughout my entire life, I have never heard my parents fight; and from what they tell me, they never do. They get frustrated and upset, but never angry. (Can we all see where I got my 'I'm going to get married right out of school and life will be perfect' view from??)
Together, and without prior experience, they raised four children. I am the oldest and am exactly 20 years younger than my mother. This has made my mother and I very close. She is my best friend. It also allowed me to be very close to my father. Not only am I the oldest, I am his only daughter...so we can all see where the protective streak may kick in. Matthew is 2 years younger than me. My mother said that when I saw him for the first time in the hospital, the first thing I said was "He has ears!!" From that moment on, I both protected him and roughed him up. Out of all my brothers, we are the most opposite. In a strange way, that makes us work. We both attend the same university now. Jacob is 5 years younger than me. He is the most centered out of all of us. Jacob is the zen, go-with-the-flow, it's-all-going-to-be-okay guy. We are very close and I affectionately refer to him as "the sister I never had"...which he hates. My youngest brother, Noah, is 8 years younger than me. He is a freshman in High School and is becoming such an amazing young man. His sense of humor is finally showing through, and it sure is unique. Not the mention, he is the youngest and also the biggest, standing at over 6 feet.
Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have a sister or to not be the oldest. But I feel that these factors have shaped me into who I am. Being the only girl, I have come to appreciate the company of guys more than girls. Which explains my large guy-friend percentage. Being the oldest has made me caring and sometimes over protective...ask any of my friends. I tend to be the 'mom' of the group.
People often ask, and I often wonder, how my parents did a great job. All of their children perform well in school, have set life goals, are caring and helpful. How is it that out of four children, there is no lemon? Like I said before, my parents never yelled at each other. However, they also never yelled at us. We were never yelled at, hit or even spanked. If we were misbehaving, all they had to do was give us 'the look' and we straightened right up. My parents have been told on many occasions that they should write a parenting book.
I think that says a lot about them. The thing that was most ingrained into us was respect. The main reason that we behaved was that we respected our parents. I remember the first time I had to tell my parents I did something majorly wrong. My Sophomore year of college I received a speeding ticket. I was SO nervous to tell my parents. Not because I thought that they would yell, but because I thought that they would be disappointed in me. They worked magic somewhere along the way.
They also also provided for the family. I would say that we are a lower-middle class to middle class family. Growing up, we always had food on the table and clothes on our backs. As I like to say, "we had all of what we needed and some of what we wanted." Somehow my parents would find the money to take us on a family vacation once a year. We had presents on every occasion that presents are called for and were often treated between these days. They work so hard every single day to provide for our family and it warms my heart.
If I am able to have a family half as amazing as the one that my parents have made, I will consider myself a successful wife/parent.
Well there it it. My family as condensed as I can get them. They are my entire world.
You do indeed have an amazing family. Actually you are pretty amazing yourself to recognize that fact. You have a wonderful foundation to build on, and great examples to live up to. I was only around part of your family for a few days and I realize how truly unique you guys are. Good on you Sarah.
ReplyDeleteThank you so so much!
ReplyDeleteSarah,
ReplyDeleteLoved your post. I will try and shed what little light I can for you as to maybe why your parents are so kick-ass! At least what I know of your mama. Some of the earliest memories from my life are directly linked to your grandparents and of course your Mama (always my favorite cousin and back in the day we were two peas-in-a-pod like Forrest & Jenny). Your mom was always so generous, funny & so sweet and we loved just hanging out together. And we were very good at it. We were experts at being lazy with one another--especially when there was hard work to be done! But what I didn't realize then was that your mom was far from lazy--I think she just played along with me because she knew I didn't want to bail all that hay! Just ask your Grandparents--especially your Grandpa! And that right there is where your mom learned most of what she has tried to pass on-- from her parents. And your mom was alway so smart--and I am not just referring to book smarts. She always had a sense of others--your mother was an old soul. Back then I didn't know it--it's only in my life experiences that I can look back and realize this. Jim (your Grandpa) has always held one of the most special places in my heart--to this day, besides my father, I have not known many men like your Grandfather. He always busted my you-know-what and still makes me laugh like no other human being can. We were always so close even though there was much distance physically between us. Your Grandfather had a conversation with me once that to this day still makes me tear up when I relive the moment. It was during a pivotal time in my life and I credit him with being such a catalyst in helping me. I love him immensely. And that's who he is and I am sure you know that about him--and THAT'S why your mom is who she is-because of her parents. So I think you see the theme of this--I am sure your mom would pay homage to her folks. And same with your Pops--he himself a gem.
All of what you have blogged about your parents is spot-on. I sometimes wish I lived closer to all of you--but it's real hard to pull me away from my Ga roots at this point. You have very special parents, brothers and grandparents. Being a part of this family has always been a wild ride. I couldn't imagine it any other way.
Dan
GO BLUE!!!!
Dan, I love that and it is so true. Thank you so much. That post meant a lot to me.
ReplyDelete